Onward to a new chapter! :D (relink)

As I walked to my bathroom to have my bath I noticed the master bedroom toilet's light is still on. I bathed using the kitchen toilet and as I did, I heard a baby crying, seemingly from the master bedroom toilet.

So freaky lah!



Btw, I know this is really old, but I'm bored so...

BOLD THE STATEMENTS THAT APPLY TO YOU:

I miss somebody right now.
I dont watch TV these days. never was really interested.
I wear glasses or contact lenses. apparently.
I love to play video games. not a good thing
I've tried marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy. however, it's not a policy I subscribe to.
I curse sometimes. who doesn't? (:
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I'm totally smart. I wish.
I've broken someone's bones. primary school. some bugger ran into my way. it haunts my memories!
I'm paranoid sometimes. always.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now. again, who doesn't?
I love sushi. lurrrve it!
I talk really, really fast. I could, if I want to.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I can't survive without Caller ID. never tried.
I like the way i look. ugly!
I am usually pessimistic. working on it.
I have a lot of mood swings. hehe. (:
I have a hidden talent. I might, but I don't know.
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar i have.
I have a lot of friends. do a lot of friends have me? :D
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone. never.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
I would rather shop than eat.
I don't hate anyone. mdm yeo! >:(
I'm a pretty good dancer.
I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother. love her. <33
I have a cell phone. -rolls eyes- who doesnt?
I believe in God. <33!
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I've rejected someone before.
I have no idea what i want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I've called the cops on a friend before.
I'm not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex. half-half. depends. (:
I have tried alcohol before. mild kinds.
I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
I own the "South Park" movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and i like it. :DDDD
I am happy at this moment.
I'm obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time. but not for long.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I've ever met.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I'm proficient in a musical instrument.
I worked at McDonald's restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like hotdogs.
I love kisses.
I fall for the worst people. haha. only I know!
I adore bright colours.
I can't live without black eyeliner.
I don't know why the hell i am doing this stupid thing.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes. depends.
I can't whistle. not well, anyway.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I've ever written in.
I can't stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep. my mum says so.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
I think climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can't stand at least one person that i work with. I'm only human.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
I'm an artist.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy. WHO DOESN'T?!

It's 2346 now, but I came online to blog. I just need an outlet.



It's just like when I'm unhappy everything just seems to work against me. Like the little thing I wouldn't have minded not finding out. And Derrick. That was a real blow. Everything just happens so unexpectedly and suddenly, and it takes so long to realise that all this will need getting used to. It won't change, at least not in the near future. I just wish life would give me a breather. Everything's just happening too fast for comfort.



Prelims are around the corner. The tension is really setting in. The class is getting kind of on-edge and snappy. Everyone only has time for themselves now.

Or is it just me?



I can't wait for the prelims. Then O levels. I just can't wait for everything to be over, and I can leave temasek. Wherever I'm going, it won't matter. I wanna leave it all behind.

Another lazy day.

I woke up at 9 because of the loud music from the TV outside. I settled down to eat breakfast and watch a bit of TV, then tried to look for my ACS paper to do. After 15 minutes I thought, "Fated", and gave up. :|




An interviewer (I) interviews a successful entrepreneur (E).
I: "What is your secret of success?"
E: "Two words."
I: "What are they?"
E: "Right decisions."
I: "How do you know what are right decisions?"
E: "One word."
I: "What is it?"
E: "Experience."
I: "And how do you get experience?"
E: "Two words."
I: "What are they then?"
E: "Wrong decisions."

(If that's true, I'd be the most experienced being on the planet. -,-)

5 down, 14 to go. ): I miss yhope! ("Why hope? Why hope?" whatever. shut up. -,-)

Today was fun! Me Johan Alia and Sarah Johan, Alia, Sarah and I went to watch Click. That gay Jeshua ditched us. HAHA. Click is a great movie! Something like a typical Jack Neo "Make you laugh, cry, then laugh again" type of movie. Definitely worth watching, despite the rather cliched ending. Really superfreakingoffthehookamazingouttathisworld-ly worth my vote. (:

Which leaves lake house and tokyo drift, two movies I wanna watch. (x



At this point, I really want:
- to watch the two abovementioned movies. without having to share the nachos! O:
- an mp3 player
- a 24h nap
- to study. I really want to alright. I just can't get myself to.
- my NFSMW back!
- eat BBQ seafood. lots and lots of chilli. (:
and last but not least,
- A UNIVERSAL REMOTE CONTROL. -,-||||||||| haha.

If you had a remote control like whathisname-Newman, I'm sure you would use it with more caution than he did. (: if you're intrigued, go watch the movie. I plead you. ^^



Happy National Day! Singapore is 41th years old tomorrow, and I'm only 9! -awe-



This is my 50th post in this blog. Haha. In like 8 months too. Failure failure me. HEY, I'M NOT LIKE YOU ACTIVE BLOGGERS YA. I HAVE A LIFE. No offense. (:



I really miss y-hope! Bet you guys in ED1 miss me too! (: haha. Shameless me.

I'm spending Saturday at HOME. ARGH. So bored. Did a question from the POA Swiss Cottage paper and gave up. School's gradually sucking the life out of me. I'm lethergic, but I can't seem to get to sleep. It's TORTURE.

However, some may argue that (so argumentative essay. dx) I'm hardly under half the pressure others face. Think the scholars. Think Eden. Then think me. The me who daydreams in class, the me who tells and listens to lame jokes during night study and gets nothing done, and the me who skipped maths remedial today just to sleep in late (it's the same me who still woke up at 8 though. yucks).

Stress? It doesn't show in my face anyway.




I asked Ray to collect maths notes for me today. Hope he remembers.




How long has it been since I last played pool? I miss it. ): I bet I'll reek at it now. ARGH again. ARGH somemore.

I'm such a complainer. (:




We spied on Mr Eng surfing forums containing mildly-adult material. He didn't know. 4V seems to have done the same thing! Haha. Gabby said some guys snuck round the teacher's table to the comp while he was writing notes on the board. Then someone asked Eng what he does with the comp and his reply was "Finding notes for physics." LOL. ROFFLES.



I keep thinking things will look up. Haha. I've become from pessimist to over-optimist.
That might not be a good thing...
...says the pessimist part of me. (:





Rain down on me
Rain down on me
Here in Your presence I am free
Pour down like rain
Come and touch me again
Lord let Your presence fall on me.

Only God matters to me now. (: I'm back on track.

I guess that was just what you wanted after all.

I'm Benjamin, God's little kid. I should want nothing more than that.

Left the ground
in black and white
And when the plane went down,
the colours all around
I know by now,
the marching slide
And still I can't get out, she's all I think about
Can't let her go
It's who you know

We came down to watch the world walk by
and all she found was trouble in my eyes
From the sky she pulled me down tonight
Let her go
Let her go

She moves fast,
takes control and like a heart attack I know I can't turn back
And time just passed,
nights moved slow
And she was all I had, I thought I'd never last
Can't let her go
It's who you know

We came down to watch the world walk by
and all she found was trouble in my eyes
From the sky she pulled me down tonight
Let her go

(Let her go)

We came down to watch the world walk by
and all she found was trouble in my eyes
From the sky she pulled me down tonight

She calls out the farther that I fly
I love that sound so give me one more line
And from the sky she pulled me down tonight
Let her go
Let her go

Let her go
Let her go

[Rough Landing, Holly - Yellowcard]

My dad grounded me! THE HUMANITY. Sigh. Nothing good ever comes out of TMP sessions. All adults warp the truth. It's a fact. (:

At least my dad let me go out and watch Pirates of the Caribbean tomorrow. That's a plus. :DD




Yesterday the whole Shooting Club had dinner together. So I was excused from night study. (: maybe not a good thing though. Now I'll not get any homework done till Monday's night study. -,- nevertheless I had fun at dinner. It was a Seoul Garden-like place. AND THE SIZZLING BUTTER ATTACKED ME AT LEAST 16 000 TIMES. Grrr. =O then me Gabby Ee Kat Cavin JJ CS LW went to play a game of dota while Eeyen watched and talked to someone on the phone. Lousy game lah. Ee snatched Kat's Razor and fed on her. >=( then fed on ME after he got pumped. The AUDACITY. *cries* the game lasted like 15 minutes after ee and gabby started to eat us alive, then we ended. For it was late. My score sucked. Sad sad sad sad sad. Cry lah.



Oh yes, I got this wonderful pen from the club simply because I'm a senior. I mean, the only thing I contributed to the club was attendence lah. lah lah lah. So touching. And it was a Parker pen. With TEMASEK SHOOTING CLUB on it. Expensive stuff. |':



"We came down to watch the world walk by
and all she found was trouble in my eyes.
From the sky she pulled me down tonight,
let her go..."

ITALY WON! EAT THAT. HAH. :D

Night study rocks, lah. (:




All the same I'm super happy that tomorrow I can take a break from it all! yay for teacher meetings.




I got all my homework done except for POA. Some MCQ paper. I don't wanna do it now! It's so late, I'm half-dead, and I want MY SLEEP! Anyway, I'm sure Ms. Soh's $1-per-undone-question applies to the MCQ lah. So. ya. (:




I'm starting to dislike physics. It's actually not that bad but although I'm not getting worse at it I'm not getting any better. It's POINTLESS. DROP! )):




Haven't been blogging much lately. Too Tired To Think every night. Anyway, no point updating a blog nobody frequents. ):

Prove me wrong. TAG!

James 4:2
You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God.

i found it! ^^







went to my great-grandma's wake today. we did some ritual then circled the coffin, etc. i must have carried 3 or 4 joss sticks. argh.

altogether we must have made like 9 rounds around the coffin, but i only dared to look in once. my great-grandma looked so peaceful. i hope i get to die like that too.

life is so unpredictable.






YED1 has a convert, at long last! he's alfonso, aloy's bro. ^^






i'm super tired but i dont feel like sleeping. chocolate day is tomorrow but i cant go, 'cause the funeral is tomorrow. =(






cheer up, x. ((:

quite little people turned up for sonic fest.

i had a great day yesterday! watched cars and R.V. cars was wonderful, really touching. it was also really really cute. the whole earth inhabited by only cars. x) it was just super-cute, lah. R.V. was also nice-nice, just a heartwarming show forthewholefamily-kinda thing. but bleh. wasted $14. and borrowed $10 from ee! and i owe him $15 for SFest. AND from today, my expenses will only keep increasing. gurhhh.










school's reopening next week! aren't you excited?! whaha. i CANT wait to be able to stay in school for about 15 hours a day, and still have to go home and STUDY SOME MORE. grrr. how icky can a principal get. lolSh.

anybody wanna go down to ee's church for the next two days of night worship? it's quite cool there.







more than ever, i want my own room. NOW. i envy people who have their own rooms. then they act like it's no big deal. arghh. i want MY own space. whaha.








tired. seeya! :)

anyone wants to go to sonic fest this wednesday? admission is free if attend the night worship. it's at ee's church! no wonder he was so enthu. -.-

it's a bit late, but happy daddy's day! i <3 my daddy. :DD

been a bit lethargic these few days. i just can't get enough sleep. >.>

Encounter!!

I'm one of the lucky people to catch the PGPR syndrome, a.k.a. FEVER! =))

It only means one thing: I've been to the Encounter youth camp, and spent a great 3½ days encountering God in a way I never did before! I've never experienced God so much within a span of 4 days before.

Thank God for the medics! They had their hands full during the camp, and especially during the Ignite concert, where there was an outbreak of PGPR syndrome. >.> and though they don't complain about it, surely they weren't able to enjoy the camp as the rest of us did. But then again, it's great to serve in camp. I was kinda disappointed that I didn't get to. =( I wanna serve in the next camp! I wanna I wanna I wanna! :DD

The teachings about the Holy Spirit were great. Then Ee Lee exercised her gift of tongues, for the first time I believe, during the second day. It was scary I tell you. I never heard anything like that before. I was in awe. Honestly. God is real!

After this camp I'm motivated to do great things for God. Not just short-term motivation again I hope. I wanna become a shepherd by end-July! If I don't succeed, poke me. ^-^

Ares is up again! ^-^

I'm mature physically, but immature mentally and emotionally. Haha! =) which means, don't deal my heart any kind of blow. I might not be able to take it. =p

I love kat! Love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her love her! Don't take her away from me! She's mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine!

Haha. So childish, need I say more.









I
love you
love you
love you
love you!
<3333






Things I wanna do:
watch over the hedge.
watch the benchwarmers (spastic-ness).
-at this point, my comp starts lagging-
buy a new comp. >.>
read a good book.
have dinner with friends.
play pool!
just sit on the grass and stare at the sea, stargaze, etc.
snatch the good comp from my bro.
hyperventilate, whatever that is. it sounds fun.
dota.
get driver: parallel lines from gene.
play a lv100 maplestory acc.
find something to post on SVLs.
pretend to be various people and spam my taggie. i'm desperate.
sleep.
sleep.
sleep.
sleep.
sleep.
sleep.
sleep.

Sleep! I'll do that last thing of the day.

School is quite fun these few days. Haha.. It's just the long hours that drains me. What makes it worse is that the hours will get longer when school reopens. So technically, this holiday IS a holiday. At least, compared to when school reopens lah. So, I'll cherish the time I spend in school, for the next few weeks. =)

Looking forward to tomorrow. I wanna see how Ms Chia writes on water! xDD

I just took this survey, which told me I have the mentality of a 9-year-old. So, it looks like I'm still young at heart. Not immature. ^-^ just young.

Tomorrow is cheena O level! And being the hardworking guy that I am, I came online to blog. haha. :)

"guilt, stop buzzing in my ear." >.>

Okay okay. Even my dad's bugging me to go to sleep. :DD

Goodluck for tomorrow!

:))) ii mishh euu sho` pliishh cumm bakk tuu miiex. xD

I wanna watch Poseidon! Movies are great. MI3 was smashing.

Oh yes, I wanna watch Over the Hedge too! =DD

So much to look forward to. I look forward, with great anticipation, to the collection of my report book too.

Haha.

Someone (EE!) organise a trip to the cinema? ^-^

Don't you know

It's not like I haven't tried over and over again

Stupid fights, wrong or right

Goodbye

I remember when you came with me that night

We said forever, that you would never let me go

But here I am again

With nothing left inside

No I don't wanna

But I gotta let you go

I miss the old gang.

Me.

Samuel.

Aidan.

Kat.

Florence.

Occasionally there'll be JW, Johan, Gab, and a few others. I miss hanging out with you guys. YES. I really do.

How are you doing, Aidan? I'm still waiting for you to tell me when you're gonna come back for a holiday and stuff. Surely by now you've told everyone but me. If you ever do drop by be sure to leave a tag.

I miss you.

I DO want to play pool again.

But it's impossible. Nobody wants to get together again, like it was about 6 months ago. When it was just plain, mindless fun. =)

It won't ever be the same again. So the best we can do is relish old memories. And hope that we never forget episodes in your life you cherish the most.

Life has lost its simplicity.

DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS DESTRESS

Forgive me for any spelling mistakes here. I can't read the screen well. It's. acting. up. again.

Currently in the middle of midyears.

I wanna do well in SS! Though I suck at it. I mean. I dunno. If my geog's already screwed, I wanna throw all my hope on SS. Yeah. That's it. =DD

Everyone else seems to be doing well so far. I think I'm alright too. I'll just see how things go.

Mug!

I only think of you on two occasions.
They're day.. and night.

Photo - Ryan Cabrera

A photo can say a thousand things
But it can't say the million things I wanna say
A photo can capture the way we were
But it can't capture the way we are
'Cause you're far away

What it's like to know you
What it's like to touch you

When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me you don't need me
and I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have one more shot

Timing, lost minutes and moments
And I might be lonely girl
But I'm not afraid
In a second it all comes right back to me
Nothing's forgotten now
Yeah everything's saved

What it's like to touch you
What it's like to know you

When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me you don't need me
and I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have one more shot

You were my life
you were my faith
You gave me hope every day

When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me you don't need me
and I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have one more shot

Things didn't use to be this way. But I suppose I've got to get used to it, seeing that the situation is never going to revert to the way it was before just because, what, I want it to? Therefore, it won't. I can only get used to it. Period. Oh well.

My supposed post about love is, at last count, 66 000 days late. But I really can't think of stuff to write about that kind of topic. Fors, you got me. LOL. I was stumped.

Well, this is probably my last stop before the exams. Or second-last. Time to mug.

Exams start on tuesday. Which coincidentally happens to be JW's birthday. HAHA. No time to celebrate! Everyone's gonna have to rush home to study. xD

Went to Raymond's house again today. I think I hamper his studying cause. But I really, really felt like having company today. And he was so obliging. Like, whee. =D love ya Ray. He even gave me this gorgeous blueberry cheesecake thing. He acted like he just had too much at home, but I knew the truth. HE'S IN LOVE WITH ME. HAHA. Kidding. I shouldn't be saying that. =x

Mid-years! I want to prove myself to Mr Tan. You wanna call my parents?? NO CHANCE. LOL. =p

*yawn* Okay that's it. I don't have much to say. Let's look forward to the future, yea guys??

Oh yes. Everyone who reads this post will have a blessed two weeks of exams! =DD

Dicey awoke to a thick, black silence. She slipped out of bed and went to the window. Night smothered the land. A dark wind blew clouds over the face of the moon and over the little stars. This kind of wind blew in clear weather. So tomorrow would be a good day to begin travelling again.

I ran home from the bus stop, threw myself into the shower and just stoned under the shower. After I woke from my half-slumber, I just swallowed water till I was bloated and feeling like a balloon, but I still didn't stop till my body felt 6 times heavier. I didn't care. It just felt so good.

That's just my weird habit. I dislike the aftermath, but the process feels great.

Haha.

Yesterday, 4V vs. 3V, TMS cup. 4V won, duhh. 3-0. Sam thinks it's because he was manager, but he's delusional. Let him be. That's the way things are. You can't help everyone, but you can try. =) Sam, I wash my hands off ya.
x)

Today was 4N vs. 3A. IT WAS NICE. 4N scored 2 goals in like 10 minutes, and we (the audience) decided that 3A was going to be, to them, a pushover. In fact they didn't seem to even have to push. They only needed to blow. =x that was in the first half.

Second half, and all of a sudden, 3A rebounded with 2 goals of their own. Yuxiang said later that his team had started to relax. They got complacent. But it was alright, I had thought, but 3A scored again, making it 2-3. I think it was then, that Kaiwu asked Yuxiang to replace him. He had broken his glasses at some point. Like no wonder, he was being a goalkeeper without glasses. Then somebody from 4N scored, and it was 3-3. From there, I guess their morale got raised, and it continued uphill from there. The game ended at 6-3. Good right?? Haha. =)

All the way 4N, 4V!! Too bad 4I didn't join. They decided without me it wasn't worth joining. =x kidding! I can't play soccer for nuts.

Tomorrow's speech day, so we get released early. Sam's organising a pool party. Table pool, not pool pool. Get it? Lol.

~joy. =)

I've come to love the rain.

I love how it makes the day cooler, makes the air damp, makes the ground soft.
I love how it keeps everyone indoors, and makes the waiting soccer players swear.
I love how rain washes away the old, and heralds the new.
I love how the rain brings back memories.

Memories happy and sad.
Memories of highs and lows.
Memories of me walking alone, and of others walking with me. Friends.

Friends who stand by me through thick and thin, rain and shine.
Friends who are merely fair-weather, but are great to have at the moment.
Friends who urge me on, friends who make me stumble.

But friends are friends. And i treasure them lots. Whether they've been there for me often or not, they've most definitely made a difference in my life, and I would never trade any of you for the world.

Think I'm bluffing? Try me. (:


I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you.

Feeling a little bit sore.

Mostly about tomorrow. Mr Toh said we only had school till 11 tomorrow! Well, that was until the teachers decided we could do without half a day off. But oh well. They did it for us. At least Ms Chia gets time to go through QA with us before the *tchok* TEST! Roar.

Also feeling physical sore-ness. My muscle aches haven't faded. Hope it doesn't last TOO long.. I want to run up and down stairs like I could before. =) and I want to stop saying 'ow' with each gruelling step taken.

ow
ow
ow
ow
ow





grr.

Anyway, I decided I want to be good at SOMETHING. After a few moments of pondering, I still can't find any damn thing I'm good at. I'm pathetically inferior. I WANT TO BE GOOD AT SOMETHING. Ever had a period in your life when you feel you just can't get anything right, and you're always messing up? Well, I'm feeling that now. It's depressing but hey, I'll make it through. =) like what the heck is depression now lol. I've felt it all before, and it no longer hurts.

Chem test! Gotta study. QA is definitely the hardest topic in the test.. It involves loads and loads of memory. OH YA, I hafta train up my memory. A memory span of 6 seconds is NOT gonna get me anywhere.







~joy. =)

When darkness turns to light,
it ends tonight. ;;

First up.

Sorry to my dear class sec 4I for being one of the main people who caused Ms. Chia's emo-breakdown, I know many people have been giving me that proverbial kick-in-the-butt but I sort of grew numb to it. Well, I have spent 2 hours doing some of my homework and I'm gonna spend a few hours continuing later. Just taking a breather for now.

To a specific someone, pride comes before a fall. You'll get what I mean.

*Recalls yesterday*
Well, yesterday was another waste of money. Woke up at 7.45am and saw JW's sms telling me to meet at 11am. I was a few minutes late as usual. Johan JW Kat Mingyue were already there. I was expecting someone to have already queued, but nope. Anyway, I wasn't the latest! Yewfie and his friend Kelvin had yet to arrive. When they did, it was about half an hour late. We had already given our cards to JW to Q. We took like an hour to get our seats. But they were all in a row, joy!

The only thing we did was dota and CS, which some of us could have played at home. But I don't know, some find LAN more appealing. Can't blame JW, he cant play at home. But anyway, being a gooooooooooood friend I went along to entertain them. =)

2 games of dota: both were awful for me.
CS: very amusing.

I also tried this puzzle-bobble-type thing but you control the little lizard thing to put enemies in bubbles and pop 'em. Very cute, but I didn't -excel- in it. Hey, it was a first try thankyouverymuch. Serious Sam might have been fun if my comp could even LOAD THE THING. Grrr.

THE BILL WAS LIKE $12++. And I skipped church too. Icky. I won't be doing that again anytime soon.

Then me Johan Mingyue Kat Yewf Kelvin went to toys r us to get Johan's bro a birthday prezzie. It was his birthday yesterday. His name is.. Jonas? Can't remember. Happy birthday to you! From your bro's buddy Samuel. ;D I went with Johan back to his house, which was at that time empty. Kat 'had to go out with her mother' and Mingyue went off with her. y00fie went home to do about an hour's worth of homework before he went to Johan's house. Kelvin followed him. y00f brought two Kohs, Samuel and John, with him when he came. It's been long since I last saw John. =) his voice broke! Then we sat there and watched even more dota which Johan and y00f arguing over who was better - Johan or this guy we played with at pavilion. Samuel found it like super amusing. LOL.

We only left at like 11+, so I'd been out for 12 hours+. Which is usual for me on Saturdays. =D

I realised Kelvin is a pretty good guy. y00f said people usually have a bad first impression of him, so I believe him.

To y00f: I still don't see the point of trying. Some things cannot be forced. ( I know y00f wont be seeing this anyway, that perma-offline fool. xD )

I don't know what I should do now
I don't know where I should go
I'm still here waiting for you
I'm lost when you're not around
I need to hold on to you
I just can't let you go.

Such a boring day.

I think this year has got to be the ultimate of boring years. WE NEED SOMETHING INTERESTING TO HAPPEN. Maybe a plane crashes into suntec city. Or something. Anything.

We wasted 15 minutes of chem class today waiting for the Ms Chia that never came. =)It was huge relief for me, because.. ya. I know it's not the right attitude for this crucial stage of my education, baaa. Changing my spots'll take time too.

Chem common test next thurs, on all the topics covered this year, up to some of redox.

The rest of the lessons were hopelessly usual. Only during english, she let me sit next to Raymond again, due to um, request of a small portion of the class. Maybe they felt sorry for me, sitting alone at the corner looking so small and pathetic. Anyway ya, thanks for pleading for me. =D

Was asleep through a third of SMT. Mr Tan let us do whatever we wanted. =/ I love that guy! If he was smaller I'd hug him.

=))


















I'm asleep. Wake me up.

New skin again! =D I think I'm just indecisive, not overwhelmed by boredom.

First day in school!
Had chemistry first thing in the day. Everyone thought this week was week 12 instead of term 2 week 1, so we brought books for the even week instead. Ms Chia was mildly annoyed. =/ After lesson she told us to return to that class for recess, as she had prepared a 'picnic' for us. So touching.. And she was supposed to be on MC too. What a unique form teacher. =P

PE was the same as usual. 4 rounds and a game.

Maths was the same as usual. And I forgot my compass and stuff for like over a week.

RECESS. Ms Chia said she liked us to use our home room more often, since only like a third of the class ever go to that home room for lessons, and the rest only see it for Alive! and FT. She's opening the room for us to study on Mondays and Wednesdays too. She provided us with sandwiches for recess. Touching, but not exactly filling. Nevertheless, our form teacher really cares for us. =)

English was the same as usual. Sabina pretended I was nonexistent. =x

Geog was the same. Half the class sleeping.

SMT. THE A MATHS TEST WAS KILLER.

So ya. That's that. I would post more if something actually happens. Life is just so monotonous.

(I never know how to end a post)

<3 clarb forever!

went for math remedial today. attendence was PATHETIC. y00f was earliest. i was dying to get upstairs to greet him but i took like 15 minutes to find the only open staircase in the whole frick'n school, which was the spiral one leading to the hall.

from there, i passed the staff room door at the same time mr toh came out from it. so no time to yak with y00fie before class started. oh well. y00f went to sit far far away from me. aww.. =(

so the class only had me, y00f, maria, chungson, suhaila and sylvia. oh ya, and eden. eden so nice. he sat with me. =))

we had two sets of notes combined into one. the first one was called more and more loci, the next one called more, more and more loci. -,- but loci's easy. free points in E maths Os!

after that, took 14 to somerset for service. i have had nothing to eat since morning, and as far as i can remember i have not drank anything either. i was dead famished. on the bus i was reading a book, so i became nauseous too. i missed somerset by a stop and ended up somewhere near cathay cineleisure. but the walk back was good for me. =)

i was eager to have a meal, but when i went up yiqin was giving a small teaching about evangelism in the early church. at first i was reluctant, but the teaching was interesting, and it made me forget my stomach. i managed to have my lunch soon enough, and it was time for service.

service was about our sixth sense, which allows us to experience God. after service we had our usual 'bonding', and then we ended early to celebrate jeremy's birthday. happy 16th! you get to watch NC16 movies wayyy before i do. =/ i'm desperate for sept 19th.

yay! today's instant noodles was great. dry as usual, but not THAT dry. fantastic. ^^ the water took long though, because the lid for the pot was wiped out when somebody put the pot on too long and it got burnt.

last thing to say: <3 clarb rawks!

we interrupt the programme to bring you breaking news.

MAPLE IS THE SCUM OF ONLINE GAMING, proudly brought to you by, the social vine losers a.k.a approximately 1/2 of t3h <3 clarb.

COMING SOON!

blogger, please dont swallow this post too..

been rummaging through my bag, and look what i've found:
1) physics worksheet after physics worksheet, undone.
2) a chemistry worksheet, undone.
3) powerpoint slides from the recent motivation camp, left untouched since the camp ended.
4) progress report, unsigned.
5) paper stating dates of maths remedials. next one's tomorrow.
6) other stuff i dont remember.

stuff i've done through the hols:
1) much much lan.
2) if not at lan, probably playing at home.
3) watched big momma's house 2.

progressive, useful stuff i've done during the hols:
NONE.

what's going on?? alright, time to give myself a kick in the POSTERIOR and do some work. if not, my head will probably be puddle-bound.

tomorrow, there's maths remedial and SERVICE. i dont wanna miss service again. i've been felling malnourished. sunday, time to rush through my homework. or be labeled a sheep, baaa.

whoosh!
<3!

All-American Rejects - Move Along

Go ahead as you waste your days with thinking
When you fall everyone sins
Another day and you've had your fill of sinking
With the life held in your
Hands are shaking cold
These hands are meant to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
Move along

So a day when you've lost yourself completely
Could be a night when your life ends
Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving
All the pain held in your
Hands are shaking cold
Your hands are mine to hold

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)

When everything is wrong we move along
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)
When everything is wrong, we move along
Along, along, along

When all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through

When all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through

When all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through

(Move along)
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)
Right back what is wrong
We move along

What is life about? My answer was: Life is about gaining experience from wrong decisions in the past to make better ones in the future. But to put the answer in less than 10 words: Life is about gaining experience from wrong decisions to make good ones. In summary: gaining experience.

What is the greatest failure in life? I couldn't find a satisfactory answer to that one, so I put in the most logical one i could find, which was: The greatest failure in life is not succeeding.

What is this life for? My answer: Life is about being able to say "I have lived" when it is all over.

Have you ever thought about these questions? What is life, really?

Standard definition of life:
1. The property or quality that distinguishes living organisms from dead organisms and inanimate matter, manifested in functions such as metabolism, growth, reproduction, and response to stimuli or adaptation to the environment originating from within the organism.
2. The characteristic state or condition of a living organism.

Uh, let's not go into detail shall we. -.- *throws away dictionary*

So what is life? The answer is probably user-defined. As in - everybody's meaning of life is determined by how they live it. In fact, the way one lives his or her life determines all of his or her answers to all of life's questions.

Life on Earth is not forever. Everyone has to die. Do you know what's the feeling of death? The problem is, nobody does. Simply because nobody has lived to tell the tale.

Standard definition of death:
1. The act of dying; termination of life.
2. The state of being dead.

Intellectual? You see, even the all-mighty dictionary can't tell us the feeling of death. Nobody can. My theory? I suppose death just feels like you're going to sleep. That is, if you die peacefully. On the hospital bed, I guess you just get choked out and then you stay that way. Nobody knows the feeling of being choked to death, because nobody has lived to tell the tale.

"Tisn't life that matters! 'Tis the courage you bring to it." -- Joan Borysenko

Life to the fullest is life with a purpose. Which brings us back to our dear motivational camp.

I encountered challenge of a slightly different kind in Temasek Secondary School, but it was with great teamwork with fellow trainer Ramesh Muthusamy. I suppose having to take all the technical segments was really quite a drain.. :p thankfully, the students had learnt to have a mind of their own and eventually propelled themselves forward. Here are the photos... HEY TEMASEK SEC 4N, 4U, 4I of 2006 - let them remember forever the day you graduated from the I am Gifted So Are You program with your results... if not, I will personally make sure you have a puddle for yourself!! -copied from Stuart Tan's blog. xD Visit his webbie http://www.stuart-tan.com/. He actually posted some photos of us there. LOL! Even the pics of people looking tired and bored.

Alright, time to end. Gotta go dig up a puddle. =)

so just like that, motivation camp's over.

well, i dont know if i'm truly motivated, so i'll not go on about how i'm motivated to get straight As for O levels, though i sure as hell want to. that testimony can wait till much much later.

to prove to the school that classes 4U, N and I are the best sec4 classes in temasek? it's possible, and the visualisation ramesh sent to us was certainly wonderfully appealing. and if it really does happen, i'll turn back to the roots of my motivation and thank ramesh muthusamy and stuart tan for their significant change to my life. in any case, i'll probably remember them forever. they're really good people.

watch out, triple science classes. x)

to my parents: I LOVE YOU. i daren't say it to their face, just because i'm not that kinda person. but I LOVE YOU, and that will never change. i'm sorry for how i've treated you the way i'd treat a stuffed toy, and rest assured i want to become the best son you can possibly have. =D

I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore.

emotions ran high today. for many reasons.

the morning bit was alright, but during lunch break ms chia gave out progress reports. it's not that bad still though. progress reports have never been a big deal. i passed 6 subjects which IS a big deal though. but the downside was, my average was 49%. -,- i think u take some and lose some. bleh. =p

the afternoon session was nothing short of tragic. rameshhhh cursed our parents to die and scolded us till we feeble little kids cried. =( actually, he was just trying to make us visualise it in a dark room with our heads on the table and the lights off, with slow sad piano music in the background. it worked. in short,

it
was
tragic.

with every sentence that evil guy finished, the sobs would increase in volume. i even heard a guy sobbing super loudly i think. LOL.

well, yeah. that guy gave me the biggest slice of reality i ever received from a human being. O.O u may call him generous. i call him cruel. =O

C
R
U
E
L

but effective.

yup, im motivated maybe. but also depressed. he was rather frank. lol.. and i dont know if i'll be anything different having taken that chunk of reality from the mouth of a hardcore realist.

anyway, he told us his life story and how many people he knew DIED. for some reason. maybe people who are his friends are jinxed. just kidding. the point is, it probably takes courage to rake up the past like that, especially seeing how upsetting it would be if i told everybody how my close friends died one by one. for that i respect him.

EDEN. u still havent linked me. =(

motivation camp: thursday - saturday

i was planning to blog last thing at night anyway, but since it's so late now i'll just make a quick one and go to bed.

adam khoo learning technology's organised motivational day camp! it's gonna last for 3 days from 0800hrs to about 2130hrs. which means 13hrs of almost straight lecture which may be almost undeniable if not for the few well-invited breaks in between. thanks to dear ray and suquan (but mostly ray) my early impression of what i knew only as adam khoo was rather de-hyped; ray said he was motivated for 3 days after the whole course and the last motivated person in his class un-motivated himself after a month or so. it's like $135 for a chance to skip curriculum for a few days. haha..

i was expecting adam khoo himself to be lecturing us, so i was slightly taken aback when the guy who was entertaining us for the first 15 minutes was just a guy named jeff, and he was only the one-man sound crew. furthermore, there wasnt a trace of the elusive adam khoo throughout the whole sessions. instead we got two other trained trainers who were entertaining, but somehow i feel the content they covered altogether could actually be covered in half the time taken. BUT i appreciate how they cracked jokes in between to sorta loosen us up. i would have slept most of the time if not for this. heh. =)

i wont elaborate on this so people who havent attended the camp yet wont exploit this post as a spoiler. x)

oh ya, and on the way home when i was catching a bus i realised I COULD NOT FIND MY WALLET. it was super scary. the first thought that popped into my mind was "God, dont play with me now leh.." xD kinda dumb i know. so i shook my bag and my wallet dropped out from somewhere. omGosh im like so blur. -,- anyway thank God for making my wallet not too hard to find. (:

now sam eeeee's parents want him to back out of AR camp. u'd better NOT i tell ya. i'll slaughter u if u dun turn up. I KNOW WHERE U LIVE. O.O

alright good night. i hope i'll be motivated to get up when the alarm rings.

yayy! new skin. black <3 xD
well, tag guys if u read. it's not as if my blog is that dead but the tagboard is almost stagnant. =(
tag!

this article in the paper puzzles me.

a singaporean man, married with a thai wife, had a mistress from china. even after his wife found out, he pleaded her to let his mistress move in with them. even though she was upset and reluctant, she agreed because he has treated her well and out of pity as the mistress claimed she did not have a home.
she returned to china soon after to celebrate CNY with her family, and the man met her in shanghai after that and they checked into a hotel. on the third day he went out to find another hotel to check into, and the mistress disappeared, together with the $100 000 he had left in his trousers. she could no longer be reached by her mobile phone as it was turned off.
after waiting in vain for 2 days he finally returned to singapore, having lost the woman he loved, not to mention a nonetoosmall sum of money.
typical?
what i found weird was that he was not in the least concerned about the money he lost. i mean, if i lost $100 000 like that i would have a cow. wouldn't you?
however, he was more concerned with "(finding) her again and to ask her to her face if she had truly loved me or was it just for my money?"
such is the power of love?
obviously that woman did not love him. obviously all she wanted was his money, maybe a place to stay for a few days. she had his trust, his house to live in, and his love. it would have been comforting to have kept all these, but she threw them away and ran away with only his money.
even i feel indignant for the guy. he was blindly following his heart.
she WAS quite convincing though. he had wanted to test her by saying he needed $10000 urgently as he was in financial difficulty.
she passed him this sum the next day. he had trusted her with his feelings ever since.
is true love worth that much? to still pine over her when she had duped him of his money. just to hear her say indeed, she HAD loved him before, even for a second, and he would probably hang on to that word for a lifetime.
his wife had scolded him when he revealed to her about his mistress' escapade with his money. would it have mattered if the wife had disagreed to let her husband continue his affair? would it have stopped his love for his mistress to go any further? would it have prevented the whole incident from happening?
and now, would scolding him for his mistake make a difference? would he ever be the same again? time will tell.
this article had struck something in my mind. i had probably never considered the value of love. and to have heard multiple stories of the extent some people go to for love, it's a wonder.
perhaps now it's time i start considering. to not know the value of love is perhaps the consequence of not having felt it, or give it. it's darn well the time i start thinking.

This is Your Life - Switchfoot

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you've broken
Don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes
This is your life, and today is all you've got now
Yeah, and today is all you'll ever have
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you wanna be
This is your life, are you who you wanna be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger, and you had everything to lose

Yesterday is a kid in the corner
Yesterday is dead and over

This is your life, are you who you wanna be
This is your life, are you who you wanna be
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger, and you had everything to lose

Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you wanna be
This is your life, are you who you wanna be

This is your life, are you who you wanna be (who you wanna be)
This is your life, are you who you wanna be (who you wanna be)
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
When the world was younger, and you had everything to lose

You had everything to lose.

I WANT COFFEE.

I WANT COFFEE.

alright let's try some absolutely off-topic stuff.
im using blogger.
saul (shud be job) ray ong kai lun thinks temasek is like sim city. i believe him.
saw this stuffed elephant at MPH parkway parade. it's indescribable.
ate $5 worth of char kuay teow. (dont look at my tummy and dont say a word)
i STILL dont know what that 'board' thing ray and suquan kept blabbing about is.
fell half-asleep on bus 15 on the way home.
i found this thing that feels like a tumour in my earlobe.
my side itches.
i crave instant noodles.
im not hungry.
people who use their MSN nicks to wallow in self-pity have funny MSN nicks.
gene says there's a show at esplanade someday and is asking me to go. currently considering.
i dont know what the show's about.
i want to fix my mp3player.
my msger's collecting dust.
listening to chris brown f/ juelz santana - run it!
blogs with music annoy me. =x no offence.
im humble.
im tired.
im going to sleep.
im logging off.

Iris - Goo Goo Dolls

And I'll give up forever to touch you
'cause I know that you'll feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'll understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
And you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'll understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'll understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'cause I don't think that they'll understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

saturday!
today was super-fun. service was about love & friendship. i think pastor jeff gave us some worthy-ponder points. such as friends loving you unconditionally, not because of what u have, etc. and how a true friend 'comes in when the whole world has walked out'. isnt that something to think about? i wonder if my friends would ever stick by me unconditionally, through thick and thin. and also if i would stick by them at all times too. i dont think so. =x but i'll try!
also, pastor mentioned about another so-and-so (icantremembereverythingcani) classifying people into 3 groups: background people [people who stick in your group everyday but are seldom noticed], machine people [people who serve you eg. bus/cab drivers, cashiers, etc. and may be or soon will be replaced by machines in the future], and people people [those who rarely NOT get noticed. like making friends just comes naturally]. to be honest, i fall somewhere in the first group. =/ guess i'll hafta try harder. support me friends. give me bad criticism, but make sure im in a good mood first. =)
after service the whole east group had a reunion dinner-type thing at fisherman's village, pasir ris park. the ambience was admirable, and the breeze was fantastic. only problem was it was so dark by the time we started eating, and i couldn't see my food. (and im a picky eater really.) so i was wishing i could glow with the natural glaring light i deserve to have, but i couldnt. so i made do with my phone flashlight. my poor phone is now panting, out of breath, and needs to be recharged. =/ poor thing.
i forgot what else to write! i remember thinking of a load of crap to stuff in just now but now i remember nothing. i had to struggle to think of the above stuff. haha!
oh well. time to sleep. later.
~~

saturday.
listening to: keane - somewhere only we know
newly obtained: eminem f/ nate dogg - shake that (seems awfully silent when it's censored :)

saturday! unusually sian~
maybe coz i missed 2 important things today namely the east meeting and SERVICE.
i hvnt missed service in a long long time!
i went for SS remedial instead. neo seemed to have high hopes of us today. she was going on about the stuffs she was gonna teach us, then wasted a lot of time in the process. then at the end she didnt finish all the stuff she wanted to do, but said how happy she was anyway. eden said she looked like she was gonna go clubbing. haha! *imagines ms neo clubbing*
then, me and wen went and i ate what wasnt meant to be dinner but made me quite full anyway. and i went to find the guys at starrrrharrrb.
i was wondering whether this was gonna happen, and it did. winstar greeted me with "today's sermon was soOoOOo nice lor! why cudnt u make it!?" what made it worse was that dennis preached a half of the sermon. arggh! they said it was pretty funny too. =(
thanks guys. really made my day x)
went to play lan after that. i guess the whole time we played i was a free frag >< not usual.
haha! poor tinker got owneddd.
then me and suquan went to elias mc for like a drink and tiny snack. then we went home.
thanks sq for listening to my woes x)
so ends another saturday.
people reading, advertise my blog! =) i need more linkkks!
okay ending here. got CG tmr!
nites!

everywhere i go
everyone i meet
every time i try to fall in love
they all wanna know why im so broken
why am i so cold
why im so cold inside
why am i scared, what am i afraid of
i dont even know
this story's never had an end
i've been waiting, i've been searching, i've been hoping
i've been dreaming you would come back
but i know the ending of this story
you're never coming back
never

yay!

first day of school! =D
seeing frens for the first time in 2 months was great.
been missing 'em. haha..
anyway veronica chia's 4i's form teacher '06.
together with ah niu. not exactly choice teachers. =(
but.. at least we got TWK back for maths.
i didnt think we stood a chance of having him back!
haha.
this year.. i resolve to study hard!
no. really. -.-
it's been my main failed resolution for 2 or 3 years
but i know i can do it this year! *naiveness*
nevermind. frens cheer me on ya?? =)

P.S. go adriano! haha. x)

erm..

uh.. happy new year?
yahh! happy new year. (:
to many of us, if we could just ignore the fact that school reopens tomorrow,
this new year actually seems quite inviting.
countdowns.. sudden inbox spams..
ya?
i know u understand. =)
back to reality.
to all of us, let's start packing our bags. big day tmr!
lookin forward to seeing ya frens.